1. Real, and sometimes brutal, honesty.

Real couple goals mean telling your significant other when they’re acting like a whiny little twit and then proceeding to tell them to fix their attitude. Be honest with your life partner.No matter if it’s just about something small or coming clean after withholding important information, your goal should be to find someone you can be open and honest with no matter how painful the truth may be.

2. Unwavering trust

Without trust, you just don’t have much of a relationship at all. If you really want to emulate real couple goals, then you have to be able to trust your partner unconditionally, and they have to be able to trust you too. If you find this kind of love, it’s worth more than anything else.

3. Open communication

Being able to talk to your significant other about anything is SO important in a relationship. Real couple goals allow you to bring up any topic of discussion, mild or severe and get through it without issues. When you keep open communication you’ll get through fights easier, have your needs met, and bond and relate to your partner on a much deeper level. All of which makes for a stronger relationship.

4. Being yourselves

This may be the most important couple goal for you to have walking into a relationship. BOTH of you have to be able to be 100% yourselves around the other, no matter the situation. If you cry during sad movies, then you better be able to let those tears flow around your significant other. If you’re a total heartless brat when you’re hungry—like me—you have to be with someone who accepts that completely without hesitation.

5. Caring about each other’s safety

Now, this may be a couple goal you’ve seen plastered on those cutesy couple’s accounts with a screenshot of a text conversation where the guy says, “Drive safe,” or “Let me know when you’ve made it home, okay?” Those aren’t just cute, they’re actually real couple goals, too. Caring about one another’s safety as if it were your own is the kind of relationship you hope to be in.

6. Being okay with spending time apart.

No couple spends every waking moment together and remains together. Honestly, you may end up killing each other that way. You have to be able to spend your time with friends or even alone. Everyone needs “me time,” and if you can’t handle being away from your significant other for whatever reason, your relationship crumbles. Have real couple goals and emulate being strong while being apart.

7. Arguing—over the stuff that actually matters—and makeup.

Arguing is definitely a couple goal and one that you may not see or hear about nearly as often. The truth is, it is really healthy for couples to argue about things if they matter. You should be able to get through an argument about something you feel strongly about and still come out of it loving your significant other. Your arguments can’t be trivial, and you always have to find a way to get around your obstacles.

8. Sacrificing certain things for each other.

It could be as simple as giving up one night a week to watch them play a sport or giving up a really good job because they got their dream job across the country. No two people live in a healthy relationship without giving something up that they like as long as it’s not something too serious. Real couple goals involve being able to give up something you care about for the other person’s happiness.

9. Being with your best friend in the world.

This is a couple goal pretty much everyone says is important, and there are so many pictures out there emulating this. It’s actually very true. In every sense of the word, you should be with your very best friend—that you’re attracted to, obviously. Your best friend is someone you count on to be there at every wrong turn, someone who never judges you, and someone you spend hours with doing nothing and have a great time. That’s why you should also find those same qualities in someone you spend your life with.

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